Getting Unstuck: Parenting, Pain, and the Power of Emotional Courage

with Dr. Emily Musgrove

What does it really mean to feel stuck—and more importantly, how do we get unstuck?

In our latest podcast episode, we were honored to sit down with Dr. Emily Musgrove: clinical psychologist, resident expert on The Imperfects podcast, and author of the transformative book Unstuck. With over 14 years of experience helping people navigate emotional paralysis, self-doubt, and inner conflict, Emily brings warmth, depth, and real-world strategies to this conversation about growth, healing, and hope.

This episode touches not only on universal emotional challenges—but also zooms in on the deep emotional terrain of modern parenting. Whether you’re navigating the ups and downs of raising children, wrestling with inner critics, or simply trying to live more intentionally, this episode is full of insight.

Feeling Stuck Is Human—but Not Hopeless

Dr. Musgrove begins by unpacking the emotional experience of feeling “stuck.” It can show up as hopelessness, emotional numbness, or a deep sense of powerlessness. She emphasizes that these feelings are normal—but staying stuck for too long can slowly erode our sense of purpose and vitality.

“Feeling stuck isn’t failure. It’s often a signal that something meaningful is happening underneath.”

Values: Your Inner Compass

A key message from Unstuck is the power of values-based living. Rather than treating values as destinations, Emily frames them as directions—like heading west. Even when we drift, we can always return.

This idea resonates especially for parents, who often face moments of emotional overwhelm. Values give us something steady to orient toward when everything else feels uncertain.

The Pain-Progress Paradox

One of the most profound takeaways from this episode is the paradox of change:
Both staying stuck and moving forward can be painful—but one path leads to possibility.

Pain, Dr. Musgrove explains, isn’t a sign of failure. It often reflects deep care—like the pain of social anxiety stemming from a longing for connection. The goal isn’t to avoid pain entirely, but to move through it in ways that align with what matters most.

Facing Discomfort as a Path to Growth

Emily describes therapy (and therapeutic reading) as a gentle form of exposure therapy—turning toward what we normally avoid. Healing requires small, courageous acts of engagement: noticing, naming, and staying with discomfort long enough to grow from it.

Tools That Make a Difference

Listeners have praised Unstuck for its guided meditations and practical exercises. One listener even joked about having to pause the audiobook while driving because it was too engaging. These tools are simple but powerful—and designed to help readers make real, sustainable change.

Therapy Takes Courage

The episode also touches on the stigma still surrounding therapy. Emily’s perspective is clear:

“It takes more bravery to step into therapy than to avoid it.”

Seeking help isn’t weakness—it’s an act of strength, self-respect, and care.

Pain and Love Are Two Sides of the Same Coin

One metaphor Emily offers is particularly striking: Pain and love are inseparable. When we try to avoid one, we often shut ourselves off from the other. Emotional numbness may protect us from pain—but it also blocks access to joy, connection, and meaning.

Parenting: The Emotional Frontier

A deeply moving part of our conversation explored the emotional labor of parenting—especially through a values-based, mindful lens.

Breaking Old Patterns

Parenting often reactivates old, automatic responses from our own childhoods. Emily suggests creating space between stress and action by first “breaking the stress response.” This allows parents to respond with intention rather than impulse.

“How do I notice my internal story—and step down from it—to attune to the child in front of me?”

This kind of emotional pause is challenging, but it’s also where the deepest parenting transformation begins.

A Generational Shift

We also talked about the generational movement from emotionally distant parenting toward more nurturing, emotionally attuned approaches. While this shift is powerful, it brings with it a new emotional challenge: guilt and perfectionism.

“Because I’m not doing mindful parenting 100% of the time, I feel like I’m failing.”

Emily gently reminds us: Missteps are inevitable. What matters most is how we repair the rupture—with ourselves and with our children.

Two Types of Guilt

Emily offers a crucial distinction between two kinds of guilt:

1. Guilt from acting out of alignment with values
   (e.g., snapping at your child out of stress) → This kind of guilt is a cue for reflection and repair.

2. Guilt from honoring your own needs
   (e.g., going out with friends while your child is upset) → This guilt isn’t a violation of values; it may reflect your need for connection and replenishment.

This distinction helps parents navigate their emotional world with greater self-compassion and clarity.

Pain + Struggle vs. Pain + Acceptance

Drawing from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Emily illustrates how pain is inevitable—but suffering comes from our resistance to it. Trying to push pain away (e.g., numbing it with distractions) only intensifies it. Acceptance doesn’t mean giving up—it means making room for pain so we can act in alignment with our values.

This ACT principle is especially applicable to parenting, where difficult emotions are constant—and often amplified.

The Heart of Unstuck: Choice and Hope

Dr. Musgrove closes with the message she hopes readers will take from Unstuck:

“You may not be able to control what happens to you, but within that pain, there is always a choice in how you show up to it.”

This idea is equal parts empowering and compassionate. It acknowledges life’s pain while honoring our ability to respond with courage, clarity, and care.

Final Thoughts

This conversation with Dr. Emily Musgrove is a gentle but powerful reminder:
Healing doesn’t mean avoiding pain. It means turning toward it with purpose, guided by what matters most to us—whether as parents, partners, or individuals on the journey of being human.

If you're feeling stuck—or simply seeking a deeper, more compassionate way of living—this episode is for you.

👉 Listen now wherever you get your podcasts.
📚 And check out Unstuck for a truly transformative read.